My dad has cancer. They thought he had got rid of it but now, it’s back. It’s in his spine.
My mother habitually announces things with enormous flourish. A printer jam, a forgotten shopping list: “We’ve got a major disaster on our hands.” This time she wrote an understated letter. “Not good news, my darling.”
Sorry to hear your bad news. All the best. xx.
Thank you Cathy. xx
Sorry to hear your sad news. Cathoel. I can only say I hope he does not have to endure too much pain. X
Thanks, Diane. X
sorry to hear this, Cathoel – sending my very best thoughts to you and for your Dad
… 🙁
That’s really kind, Billy, thank you, I will pass them on. And keep some for myself.
Ta, Manfred x
thoughts with you all xo
I’m so sorry to hear this news 🙁 LUV & LIGHT!!!
Really sorry to hear this ‘Oel. Much love to you 🙁
So sorry… I hope that all of the family are managing ok. This time must be stressful. Thinking of you.
My love, thoughts, strength. X
I am so sorry to hear this, Cathoel. Hugs to you in being as gentle and as strong as you need to be.
Oh, I’m so sad for you and yours. I hope the love flows generously between you all as you work through it. XO
<3
🙁 xx
X
Hugs, Oel.
<3
Just being practical, having been there, Get him to write down his wishes for the last few days when he will not be able to respond, so someone doesn’t come along in the emotional intensity of ait all and impose something that is not related to what his life has been about, without his permission. It sounds like he will die: the main thing is to make sure he dies as he would wish. I’ve no doubt there is a vast amount of water to go under many bridges yet, but…don’t leave it too long.
Thank you SO MUCH Karl-Erik, I can indeed imagine that happening and your suggestions are excellent. I’m very sorry to hear that you have learned them. Thanks for passing on the wisdom of the experience. And vale.
Everybody, thank you for your loving thoughts. I really appreciate it and I’m going to pass them on to my Dad and Mum. Feels good to hear from ya’ll. X
Oh dear lady wordsmith, I grieve for you. All the conflicted feelings and torment and the distance that can be flown and the distance that can’t. Much love, and oh how I understand after dad last year…so close were we that we had discussed his funeral. May there be peace and painless resolution, well as much as there can be.
Oh….sorry to hear this news
my heart goes out to you Cathoel, your dad and family X
Very sorry, Cathoel. I hope he beats it.
Ah Cathoel. I perhaps know something of what you are experiencing. My mother has cancer. It began 18 years ago. She was diagnosed, told shed live a short time. Got well, got sick again about 6 years ago. It’s been in her bones and lungs, recedes, comes back. It’s cruel, cancer. I wish you all the least cruel pathway possible, whichever way things go. Rxx
Oh, Raelene! I didn’t realise you and your mother had been going through this for so long! So even when we first met… you were dealing with cancer. The admin and the grief. I’m so sorry this has infested your lives. Thanks for your kindness. xx
Hope he beats the bastard!!!
So sorry Cathoel…
So very sorry Cathoel. Sending love and blessings.
No words, Cathoel. Thoughts with you and your family.
Sorry to hear of it, Cathoel… 🙁
Just sending you love
Jockie xx thank you my dear love
<3
Ahh, that’s rough hon. Many shades of pain
Dear Cathoel, I hope you and your family get to spend lots of time together as you want to spend it xx.
Thank you so much, Brendan. My family and I are at painful odds. There is one brother I cannot see because his violent unpredictability makes me too frightened. It’s not at all clear I will be able to go back, even for dad’s funeral. Am so torn. I appreciate your generous thoughts xx
🙁 Sending love and hoping for grace. X
Strength to you
Sending love Cathoel.
I’m so sorry to hear this – and about the ‘painful odds’. I was unable to be at my father’s funeral – it was in India, there were visa issues and I wasn’t comfortable with leaving my children. Yes, it stung at the time, but I was going to grieve anyway, and not being able to be there didn’t change my love for him or my sorrow at his passing. Hugs from the UK x
My grandpa had spinal cancer. As he got sick he melted emotionally, and we got to meet a part of him hithertofore unknown. It was a gift in the midst of all the sadness and other mixed feelings I had for him. Sending you love.
That’s very sad, Cathoel, and even sadder about your brother. You’re on my mind.
xxx
Sorry about your dad’s sad news Cathoel. Keep steady. X
I’m so sorry to hear that, Cathoel…sending love & strength xx
Cathoel. What a hard time you are entering. For so many reasons including your relationship with your family, and coming to terms with death. Sending you love and light. Having lost a parent, my counsel is to look sometimes through the lens of no regrets. xxxx
Hugs to you dear gentle soul….
So poignant. Reads like the opening of a short story.
So sorry to hear about your Dad, Cathoel. Sending hugs. Xx
very sorry to hear about your dad, Cathoel.
I’m sorry, Cathoel. Be with him when you can.
very sorry, Cathoel. xx
Very sorry to hear that. xx
I feel for you very much Cathoel. That illness has been part of my family. I study supplementary medicine because of it. When it’s serious, there are certain supplements which can provide some ease. Thoughts, feelings, prayers. All time is precious.
That is a real dilemma, Cathoel. I’d probably go anyway, but I am the oldest brother of five guys…
Life is serendipitous, some is good, some less so. I wish I could be there to give you a supportive hug, but you’ll just have to imagine it. I hope you are able to spend some time with him soon, and know you have a lot of people caring about you and your Dad all over the world.
Let me know if there’s anything I can do on this end Oel. So sorry mate. Hope you can connect with your family in a way that works for you.
Holding you tightly dear one.
Hugs.
Very sad to hear this., I wish for you STRENGH and LOVE……….
You are in my thoughts Cathoel. It’s never an easy transition loosing a parent. From my experience loosing my father to cancer in the UK ( whilst I was in Oz) there can be so many complex family dynamics play out and onc can never know the ” best time” to be with them with the extra complexity that massive physical distance brings. I believe to from your writings that relationship with your father has sometimes been fraught or at least some distance has developed. I hope that there are opportunities to put some ghosts to rest if need be and working with what’s achievable whilst there’s time .
Sending love to you and all your family.
Oelly darling… Sending loads of love to you and your family…..Good earlier suggestion to have your dad clarify his end-of-life wishes. And please be as kind to yourself as you are to others in finding your way through this time, whatever it may bring. I’m almost a year into my metastasised cancer scenario and inspired by Australian terminal cancer survivor Kristine Matheson’s story & health protocols….see http://www.cancertowellness.com …your folks may find her info helpful too xxxx
Sorry to hear this Cathoel. Thoughts and prayers to Dad and your family.
I wish your dad and your whole family the strength and love you will need. xxx
Having also been there, and having a friend and a relative going through the same thing at the moment, Karl Erik’s advice is the best on this page. Spare you any more reflections / advice (unless you want them – offer not an obligation) – I recall not finding them that helpful at the time. All People / Dads / Families / Cancers are different. Look after yourself and remember that there are friends (and 2 degrees of FB seperation others) that can empathise with what you are going through.
So sorry. Prayers and positive vibes you and your family’s way.
Oh hon, no it’s not good news. Find away too see him. Fuck fear/ guilt and what if’s. If you want to see him, then find away. We ( nurses) routinely protect individuals from others in hospital settings. Peace the end game. Xo loving warm hugs
…with you in this as you were for me my friend..xx ..love to you..
I am so very sorry to hear this…my heart and love is with you! Big warm hugs to you, from me….
I’m so sorry. xo
Hi! Find a person with a Rife Machine or Bodyscan machine. I have a practitioner friend using these to reverse cancer and other diseases.
Hey…. very much love and light coming your way sis…xoxoxo
so sorry god bless you and your family
trying time for family Cathoel hope it can be reversed with remedial treatment. I pray for intercession from the Lord for your dad.
You are loved.
Wish I were there. xoxoxo <3 R
Leave a Reply to Cathy Stephens Cancel reply